Adam, Beloved Mentor (2)

by Tim Anders <Timlovesjase@yahoo.com.au>

Adam, Beloved Mentor (2) by Tim Anders

Revised version of 'Back in the Big Smoke' (Sequel to 'Country Life').

Adam's strict disciplinary measures worked well on the whole. Still, like any healthy 18-year-old, I overstretched the bow sometimes and invariably ended up in tears, due to the harsher than usual punishment that inevitably followed. He hated to see me cry but believed that we all must endeavour to overcome our own limitations. Consequently, he always carried out what he considered appropriate, even if it hurt him. This was one of those cases, and neither of us was looking forward to its 'resolution'.

Having told me to prepare for my punishment, Adam took me by the shoulder and led me back to the sitting room where Brian and Roger had helped themselves to drinks in the meantime.

"Back already?" Brian cheered, assuming we'd just had a 'quickie' in the bedroom.

"Yep," said Adam.

"You MUST have been in a hurry!"

"Yeah, I was, but there's been a change of plans."

"Oh? I mean, I don't want to pry, but - "

I thought 'yeah, pull the other one. You're busting with curiosity.'

"- you seem angry, mate."

"Tim's _f_u_c_k_ed up his course good and proper."

"Ah, that's too bad," Brian sounded concerned, but somehow I had the feeling he knew what was coming. "Anything you can do to retrieve the situation?"

"Doesn't sound like it. But I can do something to discourage a repetition. What really annoys me, it's all due to bloody carelessness," he slapped my bottom quite hard.

"So, what happens now?"

"Well, for starters, he's earned himself a thrashing, so it won't happen again."

I kept wishing I was elsewhere, and looking at Roger, he seemed as uncomfortable as I felt.

"Good," said Brian, "nothing like a well tanned backside to make young blokes responsible for their actions. Six, seven years ago I had to do the same to you, for similar reasons -" "And the rest," Adam agreed with a grin, "till I got too big for you."

"You grew up. But it made you the man you are now. I keep telling Roger, we all make genuine mistakes, but carelessness is unforgivable. Isn't that so, son?"

Roger blushed, "yeah." Obviously embarrassed by all this, he got up from his seat and walked over to one of the windows.

"But, we have very effective means to discourage sloppiness, haven't we, mate?"

Roger was looking out the window and wasn't responding.

"Roger??"

"What? er - yeah, I guess -"

Adam rescued Roger from further embarrassment, "so have we, mate, believe me., He slapped my bum, as if to propel me to the place of execution, down the passage. "Go on then, I'll be there shortly." My face felt so hot, I was sure it was red with embarrassment.

"Well, I'm glad to see you're carrying on the tradition," I heard Brian say as I walked down the passage. I would have liked to catch more of the conversation, but I was in enough trouble already. So I kept walking.

Once in the study I left the door ajar but could hear only voices without being able to make out what they were saying. I quickly cleared the desk, stripped completely, and then waited with my belt in one hand, touching and rubbing my bare buns with the other, as if to test for a last time how they felt before that belt slammed into them.

There was a knock on the door, and Roger came in. "Adam said it was allright to see you."

"Yeah, sure." I was a bit self-conscious, standing there naked, with this boy I hardly knew, gazing at me.

"I'm sorry about your essay, mate, I really know how you feel right now. Been there many times - "

"Thanks, mate, but it's my own bloody fault. If it wasn't for Adam, I'd give myself a belting." I was so moved by Roger's concern, I almost forgot my nakedness, or maybe it didn't worry me any more.

"I know how it is, believe me. Brian is pretty strict, too," Roger continued, and in spite of my predicament, I was warming to him fast, and my little mate started rising. I put my hand over him but Roger had already noticed. "Don't be embarrassed," he laughed, "happens to me all the time look, I've had a hard-on ever since Adam said you're in for it. Sorry about that."

Sure enough, I could see it clearly in his rather tight jeans. I grinned, "don't be sorry, mate, seems we're two of a kind."

Roger gave me a hug, "I really AM sorry, mate, even if you say you deserve it. It's a bugger. It bloody hurts," he patted my bare bum, "I wish I could make it hurt less . . ."

"Thanks, mate, but I've earned it fair and square. Truly." I put my arms around him, our faces touched and I felt like kissing him, but I didn't.

He rubbed my buns, "you always getting it bare?"

I nodded, "always."

Standing there, naked, with this fully dressed, good looking guy, had something extremely _s_e_x_y about it. Cautiously, my hand wandered to the bulge in his jeans, "what about you, you have to bare yours too, when you get it?" My voice got a bit hoarse.

"Most of the time, but I usually get the cane." He stepped back, touched my little mate for a moment, but then quickly moved on and took hold of the belt in my hand, "you going to get it with that?"

"Think so. Adam said to have it ready."

"Maybe you're lucky. I reckon getting the cane is worse than the belt."

"Hmhm, you're probably right, mate. I know the sting of the stick. My dad used to have half a dozen of them and he knew how to set my arse on fire."

"So does Brian," Roger said ruefully, "he's a bloody expert. I'm not saying I didn't deserve it, but I've still got stripes from four days ago."

"What??" I was really shocked. "That's a bit much, isn't it? I mean, even if it hurts like hell, it never shows on my bum for more than a day or so."

"Me too, usually, but this was a real bad one." He gave me another hug, "I am sorry, Tim. Believe me, I know how you feel right now."

I hugged him back, "thanks, Rodge."

"Keep your chin up, mate. It'll soon be over."

"Wish it was."

He touched my arm, "Better get back - be thinking of you, mate."

"Sure. Tell Adam I'm ready."

"Will do."

As he turned to go, I felt like crying, thinking 'I must meet him some time and get to know him better.' He was clearly a kindred soul.

Adam and Roger met at the door. "Stay if you like," he said, but Rodge declined politely.

"Why did you say that?" I asked.

"Thought you'd like some moral support. He was worried, asked if he could go and see you."

"Yeah, he says he knows how it feels."

"That's what worries me a bit. I know Brian, used to live with him when I was your age."

"I gathered that from what he said. You never told me. Was he as strict as you?"

"He gets a bit too rough sometimes. But I was a lot bigger and tougher than young Roger. I don't want him to get hurt. Seems a nice kid."

"Yeah, he is - "

But that's not what we're here for."

"No, sorry - " I handed Adam the belt and asked him to punish me for my stupidity.

My little mate knew what was coming, and was not entirely dormant, but certainly not upright. Adam took hold of him and very roughly pulled the foreskin back as far as it would go.

"Ouch!" I said, "that hurt!"

"I know, and I want you to report like that for all your punishments in future. If you forget, it'll hurt again, not only there, but on your bum as well."

That little gesture made me feel barer than bare, even though we did it to each other all the time in fun and _s_e_x_. Somehow, in the context of discipline, it was far more mortifying than such a small bit of skin would warrant.

Adam said the first part was going to be 'the full 15', which was our upper limit for any one 'session'. I more or less expected the 'full measure', but it had never been invoked before, nor had there ever been more than one 'part'. My face must have shown shock or surprise.

"Is that what you deserve?"

I swallowed hard, "yes, Sir." I don't know why I called him 'Sir', it was not part of our usual ritual. Somehow the situation must have warranted it, it just slipped out.

"OK, you know the drill, bend over the desk and hold tight," he said, and when I was in position, "start counting when you're ready."

Normally I had to count each stroke as it hit my backside, but this was new. After a moment, maybe realising I was confused, Adam added, "you decide how quick or slow it's going to be. You call the shots and I fire."

Bewildered, I realised he wanted me to call for each stroke to be applied to my bare bum, thereby bringing it on myself. It's quite a _s_e_x_y notion in retrospect, but at the time it wasn't.

"One," I said, WHOOSH, SLAP, the belt hit with unexpected strength, leaving a burning feeling in the target area. "Ow!" I yelped after gasping for air, thinking 'I can't take 15 like that'. I was waiting for the next one to slam down but nothing happened. I'd already forgotten the new arrangement.

Adam guessed what was going on in my mind, and helped me along, "you ready?"

Having to 'ask' for every stroke was a very powerful device to increase my punishment. I knew there was no way out and wanted it to be over quickly; but at the same time, I was still feeling the sting of the first lash and didn't really want another added to it.

I gritted my teeth, "Yes."

"Well?"

After a deep breath, "two!" SLAP, CRASH, the belt tore into my bottom. "Owowow!" Hell, I could tell, he was angry, and he certainly let me know about it. I resolved to be brave and count more quickly, but it was sooo hard!

"Three!" WHACK. "Owowow, Ohmygawd! Four!" Tears were already running down my face. I called out "five" and "six" almost recklessly, as soon as their predecessor landed. It got worse with every stroke and I was openly howling after number seven.

Adam's hand was touching my face, then stroking the back of my head, "take a few deep breaths, mate." His voice seemed a little shaky. He then stepped behind me and massaged my sore buns, making me cry even more. He couldn't have shown his love and compassion more clearly. A few moments later, he cleared his throat and retrieved his macho front, "well, this isn't getting you punished as you deserve, better start counting."

"Eight!" SLAM!!

I yelled, getting louder after each stroke, but kept counting, sobbing unashamedly, kicking my legs, grimly holding on to the desk with my hands, till we reached fifteen. I was exhausted and just lay there across the desk, howling my eyes out, swearing I'd never be so careless again. I could feel Adam's hands on my bottom, gently massaging and rubbing, then he pulled me up and took me in his arms. Did his eyes look moister than usual? That made me feel worse and the punishment even more appropriate.

Finally, he let go of me, resuming his disciplinarian mode, "I hope, by the time we finish you'll have learned something from all this. I don't want to have to repeat it."

I was rubbing my sore buns, "yes Adam, I promise you won't have to. I'll make a real effort."

"Good," he said, handing me back my belt, "we'll reinforce that attitude at the weekend."

"Wh-what's happening at the weekend?"

"You didn't think this was all, did you?"

"Isn't it?" I had been forewarned when he earlier said 'first part' but must have been hoping he'd relent. No such luck.

"No, mate, it isn't. Brian's talk about canes reminded me, it's time I carry out my threat to get a proper cane."

I was still rubbing my backside, but was my little mate stirring at the sound of the word 'cane'? Surely not, with an inflamed bottom like mine, at this stage!?!

"So, come Saturday, you and I are going to buy a cane or two and you'll get another 15 as the next part of your punishment. Until then, I'll be putting you over my knee once a day." He took me in his arms and stroked my hair, "I'm sorry, mate, but it has to be done."

"Yes," I sniffled, "I know, I'm sorry to do that to you, mate, but I deserve it."

"You sure do," he slapped my tender bare buns.

"OUCH!" My hands went back to my buns.

"OK, get dressed and join us for a drink, then."

"I don't know if I can face them, Adam."

He pulled me very close, "listen, mate, I want you out there. I know Brian. He's only waiting to see you in tears. Come on, be a man and show him you can take it! No point sulking in here," and then he kissed me, how could I refuse?

I took a deep breath and put on my bravest smile, "allright, mate, just for you. But I'll need a few minutes to clean up."

"Sure, Just don't be too long, or else." Another smack on my tender bum as he left. I yelped.

I got dressed, washed and tidied myself up, took a few deep breaths in the bathroom, and then joined the others, trying to put on a sort of smile.

"Ah, here he is," said Brian, sounding very jovial, "you OK, son?"

"Yes thanks, I'm fine." I sat down somewhat gingerly, but it wasn't too bad.

"Sore bottom, eh?"

I nodded with a faint grin, "hmhm."

"I'm not surprised, it sounded pretty fierce." _s_h_i_t_, they heard me yell! Maybe just as well I didn't think of that at the time.

"- er - yes," I said, too embarrassed to think of anything else to say.

Adam kissed the top of my head and handed me a drink, 'here, get yourself around that."

"Thanks, mate." I was grateful for his show of affection. This Brian was a pain in the arse.

"It's nothing shameful, you know," he started again, "do you realise how lucky you guys are? Young colts need a firm hand to keep them out of trouble. Sorted me out when I was your age. Too many young blokes go off the rails these days. Not enough discipline." He looked around for support, but I evaded his glance and looked at Roger, who looked at me.

Adam broke the silence as he sat next to me on the settee and put his arm around me. "Sure, it's nothing dishonourable, but you can't blame them for being a bit embarrassed about it," he squeezed my shoulder, as if to say 'I know how you feel, mate.' I looked at him with a sheepish grin, thinking 'you give me a sore bum sometimes, but we love each other, and you're all mine.' And that warm glow from my bottom seemed to spread all over me.

"Sure they are bashful about it," Brian said, "and so they should be. All part of the discipline."

"Yeah, I suppose it adds another dimension," Adam agreed.

"Roger hates it when people know about his punishments, don't you, son?"

Roger was just getting up, maybe to escape from the conversation. "No, I don't," he said. "Specially all the smirks and sneers."

"I wouldn't do that, mate, I'd commiserate." I winked, and we understood each other. Everybody laughed, and I hoped we'd finally exhausted the subject. - No fear!

"As I say, there's no shame attached to getting a hiding when you deserve it. In fact you should be proud of it, because someone cares enough to consider you worth the bother."

Adam squeezed my shoulder again, reinforcing Brian's observation, "hey, that's pretty neat," he said, "I must remember that."

I must say, I hadn't thought of it in that light, either. I nodded agreement, even if I wasn't too keen on the man who said it.

Brian seemed pleased and looked at Roger who sulked, "I still think it's bloody embarrassing."

"Precisely my boy, as I said, all part of the discipline. Character building they used to call it."

Roger wasn't giving in so easily. "Allright, I accept that, but I don't have to like it."

"No, you don't have to, you're not meant to like it, but you'll still have to put up with it."

"Allright, Brian! I AM putting up with it, And I understand it's going to improve my character. Now, can we LEAVE it?" Roger's slightly raised voice showed he was getting agitated. I didn't blame him. I'd had about enough of that topic, too.

"My, oh my, we are a little testy," Brian said, "You may not be looking forward to having your bottom spanked when we get home, but that's no reason to lose your temper."

"Sorry," Roger apologised.

"I ought to take you down to where Tim's just been, for a little lecture, but maybe we'll just add three more to your punishment tonight."

"I DID say sorry," Roger protested.

"So you should, and you'll be sorrier still, I promise. After all, you brought it all on yourself, didn't you."

Give me strength! Talk about sensitive! The guy had already said 'sorry.'

"Well, didn't you?"

"Yes, I did, and I deserve to get the cane for it."

My heart went out to Roger. I decided I definitely must try to meet him alone some time.

Brian beamed. "Good, as long as we're clear about that." He turned to me, "looks like you two boys are going to have something in common tonight, - sore bottoms."

Ha ha, very funny. He was the only one laughing. I wanted to tell him I didn't care how sore my bottom was and I wasn't going to lose any sleep over it, as long as I could snuggle into my Adam's arms, but I just grinned politely.

"I'll say one thing for Roger," Brian looked at Adam, "he needs frequent discipline but nothing like you did." This was a side of Adam that I hadn't heard about, till he touched on it earlier in the study. I'd have to ask him about that because my little mate seemed to be interested.

"What do you call frequent?" Adam wanted to know.

"Aw, two, three times a week, on average," he looked at Roger, "wouldn't you say so?"

Roger blushed, "yeah, I guess so." He was as uncomfortable as I was.

"Same here," said Adam, ruffling my hair, "but this week we'll exceed the average. Today was only the first half of the punishment. We'll be buying a couple of canes for the other half."

'Oh Adam,' I thought, 'did you have to?' I didn't normally mind if friends knew that Adam spanked my bottom, but Brian?

Brian was surprised, "haven't you got a cane?"

"Nope."

"Well, let me tell you - " and he started extolling the virtues of that 'peerless implement of discipline, the only suitable device to keep unruly young guys in check', constantly trying to embarrass Roger and me with pointed remarks and questions. I was surprised Adam went along with it, but maybe he felt a bit of 'character building' wouldn't do me any harm.

I hugged Adam, to show Brian there were no hard feelings, only 'warm' ones. "Would you mind awfully, if we leave you two oldies and I show Roger my stamp collection?"

Adam understood the joke. He knew I haven't got a stamp collection. "OK, if you guys want to compare notes, don't let us stop you," he laughed, and we were out of there like a shot.

"Maybe he wants to show Roger the result of your efforts," I heard Brian say, as we went done the passage. I couldn't hear Adam's reply, but my little mate reacted very positively. I wasn't sure if Roger had heard the remark, but the moment the study door was shut behind us, we fell into each other's arms and kissed, no words, no questions, it was great.

Hands roamed all over clothed bodies, rigid little mates, still inside our jeans, began grinding against each other, and Roger said, with his hands firmly on my bottom, "can I see?"

"What, back or front?" I was so horny, I momentarily forgot that Adam and Brian were only a few steps away.

"Both?"

"Sure," I undid my jeans and pulled them down, "can I see you too?"

Roger had already opened his and pulled them down before I'd finished asking.

We were both aware how precarious the situation was, and we truly just looked, touched, and marvelled at those newly revealed vistas. I could have been easily carried away, but caution and good sense , especially Roger's, prevailed.

I still don't know what came over me, to go even that far. After all, I loved Adam and never played around with other guys. Maybe a special bond with Roger was in the making, after his moral support and comforting me in my nakedness, prior to the belting Adam gave me. He was, after all, not just an absolute sweetie, he was quite cute looking as well, about three months older and only a little taller than I, with hair was so blond that some questioned if it was for real, but it was. And he had the biggest deep blue eyes, set very far apart which gave him a rather striking appearance. So, feeling a little fragile, I sort of fell for his charms, I guess, and our kisses and 'explorations' could have led further at the time, if 'our men' hadn't been on the other side of the door. Instead, we made a date to meet next week. I was worried about the cane on Saturday and wanted that well behind me, before I met Roger again.

He asked about my punishments in general and the one I got just a moment ago. I told him what he wanted to know, including my need for corporal punishment as a 'cleansing agent'. It was the first time I analysed it so openly, and I wasn't embarrassed at all. Maybe this wasn't surprising, since we were in the same boat, at least when it came to discipline. Roger never mentioned love, when he talked about Brian. Months later, we were to find out why.

We discovered, we were doing similar courses, even the same subject in one case, but our lectures and tutorials were at different times, which explained why we'd never met. Still, we were both surprised we hadn't noticed each other outside lectures or tutes.

Then we heard Eventually Brian call, "Roger, we should be going soon."

"Coming," Roger replied, hugging and kissing me once more.

Remembering Brian's earlier remarks about Roger getting the cane, I patted his cute bottom in those tight jeans, "I hope it won't be too awful when you get home."

"No worries, mate, I'll live. I'm only getting six tonight, much less than what you got."

"What about the extra three?" I reminded him.

"Oh, _s_h_i_t_, I forgot! - yeah, ok, nine then, - still less than yours."

"I'll be thinking of you."

"Yeah, me too."

We joined the others after a last, brief kiss, and Roger and Brian departed fairly soon after, leaving Adam and I to have a long talk about what happened. He was angry and hurt because I'd let him down, which was one reason I was still under a cloud. The other was that the slate wouldn't be clean till the other half of my punishment was fully administered. He sounded almost like Dad, "I just can't believe you could be so stupid, you got brains, you've been doing so well, I was proud of you, and then you go and _f_u_c_k_ it all up."

"Look, I'm just as angry," I said, "it's not as if I did it on purpose. I just misread the date."

"That's the trouble with you, you always 'just' forgot, or 'just' didn't concentrate, or 'just' this, or 'just' that."

"Tell me about it! I've had that problem ever since I was a kid."

"Well, it's time you grew up, mate. You can't go through life like that, or you'll need a nanny, a permanent minder."

"But I've got YOU to keep me in line." - I meant that in the nicest possible way, to show him how much I appreciated his concern for me, but as soon as I said it, I knew I shouldn't have.

"There you go again," he slapped my thigh, "you got to take more responsibility for yourself."

"Sorry, I just meant --"

"I know what you meant. Look Tim, I don't like having to make you cry, but I will, as often as it takes to make you become more responsible. I mean, what are you going to do if I get hit by a truck tomorrow, eh? Run back to Daddy?"

"Adam, that's awful! Don't -"

"Tim, matey, darling, sweetheart, I love you, I really do, you must believe me! I just want to be sure you're ok, but you're a walking land mine. I love spanking your cute little arse to keep you in line, you know that. But, mate, this is different. I'm talking about your whole life. You've been bloody lucky so far, but you can't keep relying on _f_u_c_k_ing luck forever."

I'd always felt so secure in the knowledge that Adam loved me, but I had not understood, until then, the true depth of his love and concern, far beyond _s_e_x_ and lust. I put my arms around his neck, "Adam, my love, I'm truly sorry. I always am when I stuff up like this, but it keeps happening. I keep wanting and trying to change, mate, but you have to help me."

"I thought that's what I've been doing." There was surprise in his voice.

"You have, mate. I don't know where I'd be without your help and discipline."

"Well, what else d'you want me to do, then?"

"You'll have to be stricter, lay down the law."

"What, belt you even more?"

"If necessary."

"You know what you're asking?"

"I think so."

"Mate, I told you, I hurt inside when you cry."

"You sound like my dad, he used to say things like that., but he still did it."

"Doesn't seem to've made much difference, looking at your latest effort," he said.

"It always made a difference while Dad was around."

"Maybe I should have a word with him - just joking! - except it isn't bloody funny."

"Will you do it, Adam?"

He said he needed time to think about it and we'd talk some more in a day or two.

There was no raunchy _s_e_x_ that night, we just cuddled, and I felt safe in his arms. His hands ran over my naked bottom, "how's it feel?"

"It's allright now," I reassured him.

"Sure?"

"Mhmm."

He kissed me, and I knew he still loved me, in spite of everything.

Next morning, he was already up and gone when I woke up. I assumed he must have had an early call for a film or TV shoot and forgotten to tell me.

When I got home from Uni, he was in the kitchen, cooking dinner. He looked awful.

I kissed him, "What's the matter, mate, you sick or something?"

"No, I'm fine. Just didn't sleep too well."

"Is that why you got up and disappeared so early? I missed you when I woke up."

He gave me one of his bear hugs, "did you now? I couldn't sleep and went for a long walk to think about things, and when I came back you were still asleep."

"You should have woken me up," I said.

"I nearly did. You looked such a cute little bugger, I felt like raping you in your sleep."

"Wish you had! Why didn't you?"

"You can't afford to be half asleep during lectures, AND you need your beauty sleep. Can't have you getting wrinkles and rings under the eyes like me."

"Adam, my old wrinkly, I love you just as you are, wrinkles and all."

"Well, I hope you still feel like that, when I tell you what I've decided about your discipline. Things have to change, as you said yourself."

There was that "knotty" feeling in my stomach again, combined with a stir in my groin. "What have you decided, Adam? Do I get a say in the matter?"

"No, you do not. We'll talk about it after dinner. If you have work to do, do it now."

Needless to say, I didn't get much work done. I trusted Adam implicitly and wanted him to be strict with me, but not knowing what he had in mind kept me wondering and wishing he'd tell me what to expect.

After dinner, Adam sat on the sitting room floor, my head was in his lap, gazing up at him adoringly. This was our customary togetherness at the end of a day. He stroked my hair and face while he was talking.

He said he agreed we needed a harsher regime. The cane would be the main tool of discipline in future, and punishments would be much more frequent than they'd been until now. Also, till the end of semester, I'd be getting a three-stroke warning every morning before I left for Uni. Even my little mate was unsure if he was going to like this.

I could tell from Adam's touch that he did not like what he had to say and was forcing himself to remain resolute. Even his voice sounded strained.

I sat up, took his hand and pressed it to my mouth, "Adam, my beloved mentor, I know this is hard for you, but I do appreciate what you're trying to do for me, believe me."

Maybe he was a little embarrassed by me kissing his hand. He gently pulled my head close to his chest started stroking my face again. "Yeah, well, let's hope it does some good, 'cause I love you, mate, you know that, don't you."

"I do, and because I love you too and have complete faith in your judgement, anything you decide is ok by me." When we first introduced CP into our relationship, we agreed that Adam had the final say on all aspects of discipline. If I ever wanted to change that, all I had to do was ask for an end to the arrangement. Of course, I had no intention of doing that.

For the first time since we'd been together, Adam went to bed early. I tried to study some more, but couldn't concentrate. When I crawled into bed, Adam was asleep, much to my disappointment. I snuggled up to his back and felt very lonely without my usual cuddle. But it was wonderful to wake up with his arms around me, the following morning.

We were both horny as usual, but he hadn't forgotten and turned me over for a dozen hefty slaps with his strong hands. I yelped, but it was only half pain, and my little mate was not to be subdued by that. Adam's was absolutely rampant, and so we engaged in some wonderful activity till we both lay exhausted in each other's arms.

Ever since our first _s_e_x_, I wanted to feel Adam inside me, even if he was huge and it might hurt. As eager as he was, he said he wanted it to be perfect for me, and in order to achieve that without pain, I needed to be prepared for it. Eventually, we embarked on a program of gradual preparation, and the longer it took, the greater became my desire for that ultimate, mind blowing union with him.

He'd been knocking at the gate many times and, although I kept asking him to proceed, he always retreated without entering, saying I wasn't ready yet. That morning, as his not so little mate inspected the portal once again, I felt reckless and said, "why don't you just push in. Let it hurt, make it part of the punishment."

It was in bad taste, and he was quite shocked. "No, little man," he said, "just be patient, we're not far off, and you'll be glad I didn't take you up on this. But first of all we have to deal with your proper punishment . . ."